We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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