Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(720): View more from Colorado

I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.

(347): View more from New York

Something to remember me by.

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(425): View more from Washington

Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class

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(423): View more from Tennessee

Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle

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(858): View more from California

Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Drank your wedding present. Sorry

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(229): View more from Georgia

someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..

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