There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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