i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
