I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
