No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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