yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Someone shit on the floor
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
