we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
