Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize