I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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