You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
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