Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Too much gin, very little bucket
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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