i just wanna soil my oats bro
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize