So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
