Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize