Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
