I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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