bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
