I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
