i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Randomize
