You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
