When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize