Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
