woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
people are starting to question the shark bite story
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
