She's JV to your varsity
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
