its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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