so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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