You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
