so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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