It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Randomize
