More tranny stories later!
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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