I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize