Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
