I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
