hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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