if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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