exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
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Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
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Rumble strips road head = magical
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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