I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize