Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
