"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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