I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
