Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
