My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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