so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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