I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize