My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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