She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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