god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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