Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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