so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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